It was when a bloke called Robert somebody from Witney got up and started rabbiting on about high streets that you realised just how much the world has changed.
The last bloke from Witney who rabbeted on at Prime Ministers Questions was, you may not recall, the actual PM in PMQs.
It’s only been four months but it is as if Dave (remember him?) had never been there.
The palanquin that used to bear him in is back in its garage and the paramedic on standby with the oxygen has been re-assigned.
The fun has gone out of the job.
Younger readers will never know, as they take time out to vote for dancing queen Ed Balls that he was not always so.
There was a time when he proudly held the title, “the most annoying man in politics”, personally awarded by the PM.
Ed used to start the crimson tide which swept out of Dave’s collar up his neck.
He could turn up the gas so nicely that an appearance of the inner-Flashman could be guaranteed.
Now it’s the Terry and Jerry show and it’s just not the same.
Theresa tries but the vicar’s daughter just doesn’t have the inbuilt Eton attack plan.
Jeremy never liked it anyway and now only gets annoyed if he remembers he’s supposed to.
Today he forgot to be furious about welfare cuts and Theresa forgot to come up with anything nasty to upset him.
With the Tories 14 % ahead in the polls, government back benchers can hardly be bothered to hoot.
Labour, meanwhile, stares off into space.
Speaker Bercow once happy to poke Dave with a pointy stick every time he could, now has to settle for indifferent insults to the less important.
Down the Government front bench those once on the naughty step have new chauffeur driven’s.
But Jeremy Hunt still hides behind the Speaker’s seat looking for snipers.
And Dennis Skinner still looks most likely to volunteer.
Luckily for all towards the end an MP got indignant about Johnny Foreigner, football and our boys – a full house in anyone’s language.
Did the PM know that Fifa were banning the national teams of England and
Scotland from wearing poppies at their coming match.
Silence joined shock before all-party outrage united the Commons in contempt.
Staring at a gift horse big enough to carry the whole of the Conservative Party, Mrs M rose to the challenge and indignation flooded the chamber.
Jeremy forgot to look annoyed.
“terry and june” flickr photo by meophamman https://flickr.com/photos/76345608@N00/5797087417 shared under a Creative Commons (BY-NC-ND) license
